As adoptive parents, especially transracially adopting parents, we are bound to run into some bias out there. We all know what racism is, right? And sexism? What about “adoptism”? A term coined by Gail Steinberg and Beth Hall, co-founders of PACT, they define it as follows:

A belief that forming a family by birth is superior to forming a family by adoption. A belief that keeping a child with his/her biological parents is inherently better than placing a child for adoption. A belief that for those growing up as adopted people, the primary determinant of human traits and capacities is genetics A belief that differences in family-building structures or... more

Continued from here

So, once you are in-country, here are the remaining steps!

16. Get settled in hotel/hostel/friend's home. 17. Sleep like the dead. 18. Buy a mobile phone. You will definitely want one. 19. Visit orphanages, talk to a variety of people and ask about available children. Repeat as needed. 20. Choose child or children... more

This may vary from country to country, depending on their laws, rules and regulations, but here is an overview of the steps to independent international adoption. I have more or less followed all these steps in adopting independently from three different countries (although when I started, there were no cell phones, no digital cameras to send back pics and no Internet – not even a “land” phone!)

1. Decide which country you want to adopt from. 2. Research as much as you can about the dossier requirements for said... more

Published here, this article came out this week. It says in part:

Daring human traffickers are taking advantage of Mozambique’s weak adoption laws in order to traffic children out of the country for the purposes of prostitution or cheap labour, Vista News reported on Tuesday.

This was said by Lurdes Mabunda, head of the Department of Women and Children in the Ministry of Interior, in a report in the latest issue of the International Organisation on Migration newsletter, Eye of Human Trafficking released this week.She said the use of the adoption laws was the latest form of... more

Alina really, REALLY wanted to have extensions put in here. We bought 4 bags of "hair" in town for $1 each. (It's actually yak hair.) Yesterday, two hairdressers came to us and for less than $50, spent 4 1/2 hours plaiting her hair. She loves it! I'm getting used to it, LOL. It is a BIG departure from her normal short, straight hair. I think it should stay in about forever, from the looks of it!

When I told you about Ivy's place, I didn't really describe it. Sunday afternoon, Ivy came and picked me up and took me to the location of the home she is building. Although no longer exclusively so, Zambia is mostly a cash-based society, so you build what you have money for, then you stop and wait until you have more. She has walls up, a roof (but no ceiling inside yet), wiring in the walls, but not connected to the overhead powerlines, a space for windows, with iron bars, but no glass yet. That kind of thing. She has people living there – no running water, either. They are the caretakers and keep people from stealing from it and/or destroying it. She wants to turn it into... more

Have you ever heard me talk about “Africa time”? (It applied in Eastern Europe, too, when I was there.) Anyway, it's the Hakuna Matata lifestyle compared to the Type A, caffeine patch screaming woman lifestyle. :) Here's a daily schedule for us (and ps – this has been typical of my independent adoptions, but not so much with the agency ones, although I still had way more “free” time than I do at home.)

7 AM: Wake up, eat bread with butter and/or Nutella and some granola bars. Think about getting dressed. 8 AM: ... more

Speaking of babies, we went to another orphanage yesterday that had babies, many of them abandoned and available for adoption – it's not a huge orphanage, but the baby room had what – 15 or so. We held babies, fed babies, rocked babies and played with some of the slightly older ones. There was a little one – Gloria – who was the oldest of the bunch at 9 months old. I actually remember her from September, isn't that amazing? She was 3 months old then and was a very alert, aware baby. Her mother had died – in childbirth, I think, but she still had family involved – the father.... more

We went to UTH today (that's University Teaching Hospital) – a huge, sprawling complex that also encompasses a medical school, a midwifery school and a nursing school. I met with Charity, the head nurse of the NICU. I met her in September – not only is she a nurse (like me), but she is a midwife (like me) as well and even goes to the same church I do. We have lots in common. :)

I brought her supplies – Vitamin K, ambu bags for resuscitation, cotton balls, latex gloves, a stethoscope, oxygen tubing – that kind of stuff. She was delighted. In... more

1. You take all the risk, meaning you can put forth a lot of time, effort and money – including one or more trips - and still end up with no child.

2. You are in your child's country for several weeks, rather than just a few days. You may have to make more than one trip.

3. The time table is more fluid and you may need to extend your trip.

4. The cost savings may be negligible after factoring in extra travel time, including the possibility of more than one trip.

5. You... more