Some Americans are concerned because things are, well, just so DIFFERENT in Africa. It's hard to get their questions answered, it's hard to actually set and keep an appointment, cell phone calls are abrupt. They wonder if people are just rude, or what the problem is.

It's different because it IS different! "Talk time" on the cell phone is expensive - hanging up before saying goodbye will end up saving you money in the long run. Sometimes there is nothing new for them to say to you.

Sometimes they'll contact you if they need to and sometimes you need to keep following up – nicely – to find out what's going on. It is also an issue that that will be lessened if you are going through an agency – they are the one point of contact, rather than having direct contact with the in-country folks.

I try to not ask many questions while I am in-country, but just let things unfold as they would. Everyone that needs to know, knows why I'm here and I figured they would let me know if they had something to tell me – and they did. They know why you came, what you want to do and that you want to go home. It's all part of “hakuna matata”, you know? And, YOUR adoption is not the only thing they have to work on!

In any country where international adoption is uncommon, there are bound to be people – perhaps many people - who just don't understand what adoption means and why US citizens (or any other) would want to come adopt. Rumors DO persist about adopting for slave trafficking, the sex trade, organ donation and more. The Romanians wanted to know if I was adopting children to sell them for their body parts to be used in transplants. The Zambian judge sternly asked me to be sure I was not adopting these beautiful girls to then collect life insurance money on them. That's a well-educated man – just not so much as to the whys of adoption, it would appear. I did tell him, of course, how much I loved these children, and how I would raise them as if I had given birth to them. Is that “PC” in the adoption world? Not really, but it was a way to explain it so that he would understand.

You know the old expression about keeping one's mouth shut and being thought a fool is better than opening it and removing all doubt. Just play it cool, baby, and you'll do fine.